Oh
the art of fear, it is a delicate balance. Fear is designed to keep one safe.
We inherently come with a fear of heights and/or falling. Oprah encourages us to follow our fear,
meaning that this primal instinct is king queen when it comes to
self preservation.
But
Fear can be a wily creature that, when left unfettered, has a tendency to grow
wild and spread pervasively. Having its root in rational fear is what can make irrational fear especially tricky. I have rational
fears but growing children has exacerbated my penchant for irrational fear. My imagination has taken what was meant to keep me and mine safe and run amuck: how could I possibly get two small children out their car
seats and to safety should our truck carreen into an icy river, I no longer
sleep naked since I don't fancy rescuing the kids and taking them to safety in
the nude, I don't like flying or travelling long distances with both kids or
just me and my husband for fear I would orphan the kids or desert my spouse if
there were a terrible accident, and I am terrified by the idea of my beloveds
toppling off some precipice. Oh, and deep dark bodies of water freak the crap
out of me, that one is new.
Knowing
these fears are irrational is half the battle I think (the other half being the art of discerning what is a rational fear or intuition) and I have developed
methods of mitigating them. Sometimes it is as simple as saying to myself,
"that is silly, drop it." when we walk across a bridge. I choose
to focus on my joy and not an imaginary loss. Still there are other times, when
the fear is more nagging and persistent, that I allow myself to move through the
fear. I imagine the worst that could happen, and the limits that I have to
control it. What is out of my control is out of my control. Acknowledging
that I have done my part to reduce the likelihood of a tragedy befalling my
household before dawn brings a sense of peace. I unplug things, I wear clothes
to bed, and I say a prayer. I give away the fear. C'est la vie.
I think it is so true and sometimes deciphering between rational and irrational can be tricky, especially I think for us parents!
ReplyDeleteAgreed! I struggle with fear quite a bit. It is difficult to catch it before it snowballs out of control. Parenting is tough business!
ReplyDeleteI loved this!! I can completely relate. I tend to have some of the most ridiculous irrational fears, and yet in other areas of my life I'm completely fearless. Fear can be so paralyzing...
ReplyDeleteJxx
yes. the fear thing. i haven been writing about it recently in my blog. will be following you! follow me if you like. :)
ReplyDeleteI am so glad it is not just me :) Welcome to my recent guests! Thank you so much for taking the time to stop, read AND leave a comment!
ReplyDeleteWhat has helped me is embracing the concept of "what we focus on expands". By turning (training) my thoughts toward "my best thought about a situation" and not "beating the drum of the worst" I have come to the same conclusion you have. Do what you can, and then dwell on the joyful rather than the irrational/unproductive. Great insight!
ReplyDelete